


Kiss You

by jaegerxackerman



Series: I Will Not [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 03:47:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8562670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaegerxackerman/pseuds/jaegerxackerman
Summary: Viktor has changed and Yuuri noticed.





	

He never meant to fall for him. 

He tried not to, but from the moment he saw him on the ice, doing his routine. Better than he ever could, the way the man's body flowed, his emotions leading him through it all. 

Viktor never had that, yes he's had a girlfriend here and there, but they were when he was around Yurios age, and some for publicity stunts. Yet he never felt the way he did at the moment, and he understands it now.

He's now learned from Yuuri, what Eros really feels like for him. This intense attraction towards another person, the hotness and nervousness you end up feeling when they get closer. The rapid heart beat, the pool of butterflies in his stomach. 

'No.'

'I hope he feels the same.'

'It won't end good.'

'If we could.'

There was a knock that disrupted Viktors thoughts, he sat up from his bed, staring blankly at the door.

"Viktor..."

His heart did the thing again, and he smiled for the man at his door.

"Yuuri, come in." 

With that the door opened slightly, the door opening with a dim light behind Yuuri, and his dear old companion come jumping in on to his bed.

He let out a sound of joy as his dog, got onto his lap. Making himself comfortable, as he laid himself close to Viktor as always.

"You never forget him." Yuuri, said in the silence. 

That left the older man a bit silence, still smiling he said. "Ah, well I wasn't asleep yet, and didn't want to suffocate my baby." He ended as he placed his head, onto the pet soft fur consuming him.

"Really, than what were you doing?"

He didn't know what to say.

"Ah, sorry it's just that everyone's asleep already and it's pretty late for someone who's an early bird." The young man explained as he took a seat, avoiding the dogs tail and petting him.

Viktor feels a bit taken back, over the course of time together Yuuri has really come to know and understand him. Other people wouldn't, they just care about who he was and the title he held for himself.

"Viktor, you're looking thin-" 

He stopped listening there, it was rude of him but he doesn't want to think of Yuuri having to deal with what he has to. He's been trying to escape those thoughts ever since he was 20, his career was only growing until he took a fall. He went to the doctor just to take a look at his ankle, he didn't expect them to inform him of anything else.

"Viktor." 

He was ripped out of his mind once again, and saw Yuuri's eyes on him. He was beautiful, yet the emotion he was showing was concern and worry. A bit of sadness and Viktor doesn't like seeing that on his face. "Don't look sad, you're far too beautiful to be looking like that." He didn't mean to let that slip, he held the small smile he had on his face, trying to remain calm.

That didn't stop the small blush from rising on his cheek, same with the man sitting with him on his bed.

The dark-haired man sighed and gave a sad smile. "You know if I notice that you hair is getting thinner, than so will everyone else."

His heart was a beat faster.

Don't panic.

He gave out soft laugh."So you do think I'm getting old, and you may just be right 30 isn't good in the skating world." He jokingly said, he wasn't wrong though.

Looking at Yuuri he was trying to keep his cool, but Yuuri gave off such a feeling of comfort, it got harder to stay hiding behind the cool calm look.

Yuuri reached for his hand.

'What are you doing?' His stomach began to have butterflies again.

"If there's something wrong you can tell me."

Yuuri no longer saw Viktor as this god among him, he saw him as another human being. He saw his as someone he cared about, someone he loved as he admitted in his interview.

"Yuuri..." 

Where does he start?

Does he tell him the truth?

"What do you see yourself in a few years from now?"

The question took the younger man by surprise, he wasn't expecting that. He sighs, thinking and smiling.

"I don't know, I think I'll want to keep skating." He said, as he couldn't think of much else, he never really thought about it, but befire he reaches Viktors age he should give a harder look.

Viktor didn't want that, he wanted something much deeper, he was never good at these things. He doesn't want to be vulnerable, not the way he feels now.

"You don't see yourself with anyone? Come on?" He jokingly said, as his cheeks turned a soft shade of pink.

'Don't let it out.'

Yuuri blushed.

'Don't do that. Please.'

"I-I haven't given, well yes and no. I've given it thought before, but these past few weeks with you. I don't know, I just changed my way of thinking I guess." He tried to explain, brushing his hand through his hair nervously.

'God you're cute.'

"I have."

'Stop'

"That's what I think about sometimes, what I could be doing, who I could be with." He admitted, not thinking.

The room was left in silence.

'...'

"Could? Why not still do the things that make you happy?" The younger one asked as he found it odd as he looked at the older one,who laid.

He stiffened, he should've watched what he had said. Yuuri, just catches things quickly about him. How sees how he acts, recently he's been reading the latter as easily as a book.

Viktor couldn't stop it, he felt so safe with Yuuri, he felt like he could be an open book. He felt like he could tell him anything, they could help eachother comfort eachother.

In just the few weeks of being with each other, they've just gotten so close and trust one another. It wasn't just how it was back in Russia with the others, something so much more deeper and profound.

"I'm sick."

He can tell him anything, the feelings he felt Eros were stronger than anything else he felt for the younger one. It's just Yuuri, all of him the way he cares, behaves, talks, everything he does sends the older one feeling such such a rush.

"I have cancer." 

He hasn't felt like this before, it makes him want to cry. It makes him want to laugh. He feels so much for the other he doesn't know how to express it.

"I'm dying."

Silence.

"I don't have a future."

He felt felt a tear roll down the side of cheek, as he smiled. The burden uplifting, finally off of his shoulders. 

"-and I love you."

He felt scared, he feels vulnerable. Opening himself up, he's always done it on the ice, but this is where it counts in a more terrifying way.

He felt a hand grab his and squeeze.

"I'm sorry."

Tears. There was and strong stop in his heart, that felt like his whole body was shutting down right there, he knew it wasn't though, not yet anyway.

"I'm sorry, you've been dealing with this for so long." There were tears for both of them.

He heard movement and felt Yuuri press his lips againts his quickly, they both made a whimpering sound.

He's wanted this for so long. 

He deepened the kiss, grabbing Yuuri pulling him closer. His body is shaking, he's crying and Yuuri is wiping the tears rolling down off his face. 

He doesn't have much longer. This will come to an end. Yuuri loves him, yet he won't get to experience it for long. There'll be the day where they won't get to skate together anymore. When he leaves, he'll get left behind, everyone will eventually forget about him even the one he loves.

He's sobbing.

At this point they've stopped kissing and Yuuri is just holding the older man close, near his chest as Viktor clutched onto Yuuri's shirt. Trying to comfort the man the raven loves, and can finally say out loud.

He may not get to marry him. 

But maybe that's just what they call fate.

**Author's Note:**

> I just want a cancer au tbh, because I'm a sinner and all my otps need tragedy. That's all I'm used to after tokyo ghoul and attack on titan.


End file.
